Because of this forum, I hear often from Catholics who are hesitant to go to AA. Certainly, AA isn’t for everybody. And there are more ways to get sober than Alcoholics Anonymous. What I hope to do is talk about the reasons why it was process for me to fully embrace the “program.” But, I’m glad that I did. Maybe some of this resonates with you guys.
The Big Book
I like the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. I do. It makes a lot of sense, outlines a program of action and provides stories of alcoholics who have recovered using the program’s 12 Steps. I do, however, still get uncomfortable when members of AA seem to treat the Big Book like the Bible. This turns me off very much. Since AA is a spiritual program, it sometimes feels like some people worship the Big Book, quoting portions of it as if it is Gospel. This uncomfortability kept me from embracing parts of AA that would help me.
Finally, a friend told me the Big Book is not the “Bible” of AA, it’s just the “textbook.” This helped me tremendously! Looking at the Big Book as a text-book, I was able to read it without feeling threatened, or like I was being sacrilegious. AA is not a religion, like Catholicism or Judaism. Some members do take it to that level; but if I’m able to look beyond this I can get a lot of insight and help from reading the Big Book.
My spiritual life is guided by the Church, not by AA. So, as long as I can consider the Big Book the “text-book,” I am ok. If I start quoting it like it’s the Bible, then I’m probably in trouble.
Community “Spirituality” with Non-Catholics
We Catholics have a lot of other spiritual practices, Sacraments, Mass, saints, devotions, the Rosary, Mary, priests, the Pope, etc… AA is not a Catholic devotion or Catholic spiritual practice. So, it’s uncomfortable for us to be in a spirituality-type meeting other than authentically Catholic ones.
In AA, in the beginning we’re encouraged to go to 90 meetings in 90 days. This was VERY helpful for me. The meetings were/are key for me–I hear other people getting through life sober and it gives me the strength to do so. Plus, my heart opens up to these people in a way that was impossible when I was isolating in alcohol.
But going one hour a day every day seems to me a lot like “worship.” It seems a lot like “daily church.” It seems like I’m starting to spend a lot of my time sitting with people whose faith and spirituality are much likely much different from mine–and none of it is Catholic.
Wouldn’t it be better if I go to daily Mass for 90 days instead of AA meetings for 90 days? Certainly there’d be more grace! But while going to daily Mass would be amazing, it’s still important to attend the meetings for me. In AA we focus on the problem we’re trying to overcome–alcohol. There are all kinds of spiritual persuasions, but a strong Catholic can look beyond other’s ways of doing things and focus on the common problem: alcohol dependency.
Why would the Steps be problematic for traditional, practicing Catholics? They’re a pretty simple, straightforward, action plan of turning my alcohol problem and my life to God. But they’re not Catholic. I know I keep saying this, but for devout Catholics, we feel we already have the Steps. Turning our will over to God, surrendering, profession of Faith, examination of conscience, confession, reconciliation, penance, giving back to others through service.
So, why would I need AA and why would I need to work the Steps, as they say?
I’ve struggled with this one a lot. I’ve discovered that for we Catholics who already have all the resources of the Church it’s still important we sit down with another alcoholic, one-on-one and work through each Step, as it relates to our drinking. Something about spending time with another alcoholic and working the Steps as they are written actually ends up making us better Catholics, more inclined to the Sacraments.
I don’t need a sponsor. I already have a spiritual advisor or confessor. My sponsor isn’t Catholic. How could she help me? This was my thinking when I first began to attend meetings and participate in AA.
However, I’ve learned sponsorship is key. This is the one person that you actually confide most of your bad drinking behavior too. They listen and don’t judge; all they do is encourage you in the Steps. They tell you how they did it, how you too can just not drink one day at a time. Sponsors come in all sorts of varieties, but if you get one like mine, you’re blessed. Getting and staying sober is tough. Sponsors are there to guide us through the Steps because they’ve done them before. Also, in order for them to stay sober they have to help others get sober.
Tolerance vs Fear of Influence
This might not be an issue for every one but for me, someone who had previously been pretty susceptible to peer pressure, who avoids conflict and prefers everybody to be happy and get along–for me, I struggled with tolerance vs fear of influence.
What do I mean by this–I’ve always been and am tolerant of everybody, all religions, races, sexes, political-leanings, sizes, colors of people–I can “live and let live” pretty well. But, I do prefer to stay closest to the people who are like me, or that are the way that I want to be. Because I am easily influenced by others. If you’re funny, I gravitate to you. So, I worried I would be influenced away from Catholicism if I got too involved in AA. I worried I would lose my Faith.
That didn’t happen. In fact, being a part of it actually made me a better Catholic, a better person even. It’s hard to explain. But I really was pretty on guard at first. Worried I would be infected with heretic points of view (ha ha–sounds lame). But in the meetings everybody respects (for the most part) everybody else’s faiths (or no faith).
So, these are my thoughts. Feel free to share yours or tell me why I’m wrong 🙂 XOXO